Why Are You Here? How to Find & Follow Your Purpose
I turn 37 in a few weeks. Far closer to 40 than I’d care to admit.
No offense to many of my dear friends who have already passed that honorable milestone, but as I inch closer to that milestone, I’m starting to understand the rumblings of mid-life crisis, and the complaints of achy bones and malfunctioning backs. This aging thing is for real, folks. And as young as I want to pretend I am, the mirror would tell me, loud and clear: I’m not.
Not gonna lie: it’s been a hard reality. It started right about a year ago, when I overheard someone comment about a picture of me: “She looks really old.” I knew they didn’t mean any harm, and I’m pretty sure they would be embarrassed if they knew I’d overheard, but like much of life, I chose to take the comment in stride.
And head straight to the anti-aging counter.
In addition to researching, and investing in, countless eye creams over the past year, I can now also tell you more about botox (haven’t done it—yet), and the struggle of losing weight post-35.
You’re going to have to forgive me for this, friends, but, #thestruggleisreal.
And along with all the increasing aches and pains and wrinkles and fine lines, have come a few other reality-shaking thoughts and questions.
Like, wow. They weren’t kidding when they said life was short. Time is flying and these moments are precious. And, wow. This whole living thing really doesn’t last forever. And, WOW. So if it doesn’t last forever, what is the point, really? What is the meaning? What is a meaningful life, and…am I living it?
Have you ever wondered these things. Like, why am I here, and what is the purpose of all this?
I have. And I’m sure I will a few more times in my hopefully long life. Why am I here?
And I don’t mean this in a depressing, existential sort of way. I don’t mean for it to be a sad question at all. Rather, I’m confident that every single one of us was put on this earth for a distinct purpose (or perhaps, a couple of purposes throughout our life), and it’s our responsibility to find and follow that purpose.
Why are you here? What would God have you do?
If you haven’t already, I encourage you to really consider these questions.
Because your purpose tells you what you’re made to do; who you’re made to serve. It shows you the light that only you can bring. And it’s your “why”—something that we all agree is important to have when you own a business, but we don’t discuss as much when it comes to your personal life. Your purpose is the reason that you get up in the morning, and the reason you keep going when life (inevitably) gets hard.
You may think you have no idea what your purpose is, but I’d venture to guess you know more than you think you do. And if you’re still a bit lost, I think I can help.
Let’s find and follow our purposes together.
Let Go
Start by letting go of what you thought—or what other people have told you—your purpose might be. That may very well be your purpose…but in order to figure that out for yourself, you need to start from scratch and see what comes up.
You need to be willing to give up what you thought the plan for your life was, and create the blank space in your mind for what it really could be. Start fresh, with a blank slate. Write a new purpose—even if it ends up being what you knew it was all along.
Ask Yourself First
Before you turn to external sources to help you find your purpose, turn inward. Have a conversation with yourself. Ask yourself the important questions:
What did I love to do as a kid? (Cliche question, I know, but it’s cliche for a reason—it’s an important one.) Did you love to write? Build Lego structures? Set up schoolrooms with all your stuffed animals? Perhaps your purpose is to be an author, an architect, or teacher.
Or you might ask yourself: What problems am I passionate about? Or, how am I uniquely suited to save the world? (It’s a lofty question, which means you’ll get a lofty answer—all the better for purpose inquiry!) If you’re passionate about creating better education solutions, you might start by attending your local education board meetings. If nothing means more in the world to you than the humane treatment of animals, look into volunteering at your local animal shelter.
Do you see where I’m going with this? No one knows you better than you, so get honest with yourself. Don’t try to think of what’s realistic or try to guess what you’ll love most—just inquire and see what comes up. I think you’ll soon find that it’s really not hard to come up with potential life purposes. The harder (but better) part comes next…
Just Start
You can brainstorm your life purpose all day—and it’s totally fine if you do take a day or two to do that!—but eventually, you’ll just need to get started. The only way to truly know if something is your purpose is to actually do it.
There’s a lot of things I thought I wanted to do—things I was at one point was convinced were my purpose in life—only to find out that I didn’t actually feel very passionate about them once I started doing them.
Try a few of the things on your list—see what sticks and what doesn’t. Is there something you thought you’d love that’s actually a little lackluster in reality? What about an idea you’d never even considered, that now makes your heart sing? Take note of what works for you, as you give different options a whirl. More than likely, you’ll see a pattern—and a very clear purpose—begin to emerge between the activities you like the best.
Forget Perfect
As with anything in life, finding your life purpose is not a magic bullet. Even as you do find and follow what you’re meant to do here on earth, don’t expect things to always be shiny and perfect—or easy.
Following your purpose once you’ve found it doesn’t automatically equate to having the perfect life. You will still struggle. You will still make mistakes.
I don’t say this to be a Debbie Downer, but to help you see that, while finding and following your purpose will undoubtedly improve the quality of your life by pointing you in the right direction, it won’t be a cure-all for your happiness. Only you can provide that. Regardless of your circumstances, only you can decide to choose joy every single day.
But finding and following your purpose sure can help.
Purpose > Passion
Purpose, not passion, is the greatest fuel for launching, maintaining, and growing your own business. As an entrepreneur, your purpose is your “why”—the very reason behind what you’re doing and how you’re doing it. It defines what you exist for, what values you prioritize in your strategy, and what exactly you offer that makes the world a better place.
It’s your purpose that motivates you to lean into the difficult parts of entrepreneurship. You know what I’m talking about. Growing your company is hard work. The everyday, mundane, down-and-dirty nuts and bolts of business usually has very little to do with your actual passion. But you roll up your sleeves, learn what you need to learn, and wade on in to get the job done. Why? PURPOSE.
And since we’re talking about learning what we need to learn, I can’t resist sharing one of the resources that provided a pivotal turning point in my own entrepreneurial journey: B-School. Have you heard of it? I could talk for days about how it radically transformed my life and business! But I’ll work on narrowing my thoughts down to a blog post for you next week. In the meantime, do yourself a favor and check it out. B-School will give you a clear and comprehensive process to follow in order to grow your business into the thriving, income-generating company you want it to be.
What is your life purpose? What did you want to be when you were a kid? What problems are you uniquely suited to solve?
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Share your brainstorms with me in the comments below!
I can’t wait to hear what you’re here to do.
As an Affiliate Partner, I will earn a commission if you purchase B-School. However, I only recommend products or services that I’ve used personally and believe will benefit your life and business. I value your trust and refuse to sacrifice that for a commission.
I have the dream in my brain and in my heart. I am a teacher that has just received her certificate for twenty years of teaching and I am ready to spread my wings and share my ideas with women and adults on a much larger and more global stage. I have the beginnings of my book in process and the website that I am hoping to build. I have been watching B-School Videos but learned last night that the program is most likely more than I can afford. I don’t want to see my dream fizzle without the opportunity for the school. Her videos have been amazing so far. But a financial commitment for a dream is scary.
Hmmm, so much in this and quite appropriate as I turn 35 in 2 days (eek!). I have to retread this post, but this stood out to me:
“Purpose, not passion, is the greatest fuel for launching, maintaining, and growing your own business.” I’ve heard/read it several times that passion won’t get you through, but then the alternative has always been hard work…that’s necessary too, but yes it’s purpose that is the real driving force.
Thanks for this.
This blog post makes me very sad as a woman who is turning 49 in just a few weeks. Our society has basically brainwashed us into believing that aging is taboo and dismissed older people as having any value or purpose. Now don’t get me wrong, I want to look and feel my best as I age, but I’m not falling into the societal trap of complaining about aging like I’m flawed in some way. I have a freshman in college, senior in highschool, and a 4th grader who’s 10. Do I want them to hear me complain about getting older? Heck no! I want them to know that aging is a natural part of life and every day you get is a gift. Also, as I’ve matured my purpose has changed and evolved into something much more meaningful and less superficial than it was in my 20’s and 30’s. Part of my purpose is to enjoy every single day god had blessed me with and not complain about it:)
Hi Susan, just to clarify: I don’t feel brainwashed, and I DEFINITELY to not think that “older people” don’t have value or purpose. Oh my heavens, I would never, ever, ever think that. Human beings are the most valuable things on this planet, no matter what age they are. Also to clarify, I did not intend to complain about my age, but rather just share the reality of it, and reality is that things don’t quite work like they used to. 😉 Or, at least, that’s what I’m experiencing. I’m sorry that this post has seemed to come across in a way I didn’t intend. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
Wow- that was a bit harsh! I’m sure there wasn’t an intent to slight the over 40 base. I’m not sure what the point is here. I am turning 58 and I didn’t start feeling like that until late 40’s/early 50’s and I attribute much of it to long distance running. Thank you Hot Yoga! Reading the ‘rumblings of mid-life crisis’ reminds me of how much you think you know in your 30’s but still have such a LONG way to go. Your purpose WILL change from your 30’s and 40’s because life will change, and change many times without your permission. I would not go back. And now my Day Designer seems less inspiring this morning. BTW- B-School and Chalene Johnson are great programs, but like anything else, they will not do the work for you or plop you in instant success land. You gotta do the work!
Hi Ellen, I in no way meant to slight anyone. If anything, I was sharing a vulnerable story in which I felt sort of slighted myself, after overhearing someone make a remark about my appearance. Everyone has a journey, and this is mine: honest, authentic, definitely not right all the time, but trying to put myself out there to share it.
Thank you for your perspective: I definitely agree. Purpose, in many ways, can shift with focus over time. I’ve seen mine change several times, as I’ve gone from entrepreneur, to wife, to mother. And you’re right: there’s no point in looking back. And you’re right about effort, too. I’m all about doing the work! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
Reading your story only 4 days after birthday #36, I get it. I’ve thrown my time, energy and love into many things over the years yet I’ve never actually listened to what is truly calling me until recently. I regret not living more authentically years ago. I often ponder the question, what if? Where would I be now in this journey if I had listened to the voice 10 years ago? There are times I think I’m alone on this ride and then I stumble across your words and it confirms that we all struggle. We all have disappointments and things that sting when they touch the heart. Thank you for showing the raw side of you even when you’re at the top.
Ps. I still find you Day Planner just as inspiring today as the first day I opened it. 😏 Keep On, Keeping On!