Find the Fear
David and I had an interesting conversation last night. After returning from trick-or-treating with a pile of candy, I mentioned that none of it was tempting to me. Which, if you know me and chocolate, is a rare state of affairs.
I’ve been on a major health kick lately. Green smoothies, lots of protein, no carbs. I’m actually at about the two month mark. Which, if you know me and chocolate is a rare state of affairs.
Yes, I meant to type that twice. It is that extraordinary.
My willingness to forgo chocolate indicates a shift in my thinking. My desire for energy, strength, and presentable appearance, has finally overtaken my desire for sugar.
This is easy for some people, but not for me. The fact that I can look at a pile of peanut butter and chocolate candy, and not tear into it is a newfound discipline for me.
And I’ll be honest: the discipline brings a bit of a high with it. The discipline offers this simulation of control and order, and I like it. It could very easily become an addiction. I see how eating disorders are born.
No one freak out! I am the furthest thing from an eating disorder that you could get. Don’t worry.
But the discipline? I like it. A lot. The energy, the strength, and the momentum that has come from two months of eating well is incredible.
Here’s the interesting thing: the willingness to lean in to the discipline practices came from a place of fear. The fear that people would think I’m selfish. A fear of being selfish. I was letting that fear control me, to my own detriment. I was denying myself a healthy life.
Once I identified the fear, it enabled me to embrace it. Lean into it. Use it to my advantage. Turn it around.
What fear can you embrace today?
way to go on your healthy eating. 🙂 I love that phrase of leaning in…doing what’s uncomfortable at first and using that to overcome and succeed. A couple of years ago i learned how to swim after a lifelong fear of the water. imagine a 40 something year old crying in the pool during the first lesson. 🙂 i did my first triathlon a few months later 🙂 and since then i refuse to limit my life based on what scares me.
Nancy, congrats on the triathlon! I love your words, “I refuse to limit my life based on what scares me.” And then using that to overcome and succeed, I love it!
WOW, this post really spoke to me Whitney! I am at the beginning of the same health kick myself, and I can absolutely understand what you are talking about. I cannot wait to see where this path leads!! Congrats….Ginny
Ginny, good job on your health kick! I’ve found that it’s hardest when I travel, but it’s definitely all about the mindset. My mantra lately has been, “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels”! Keep me posted on your journey!
oh whitney, i came to the site to get the values worksheet that the day designer pointed me towards and have spent the loveliest 10 minutes on your blog. grateful for the clarity of your writing that inspires me to write more, grateful for this amazing day designer that is rocking my morning, grateful for green smoothies and health and especially grateful for you. i feel your momentum and it’s a wonderful sight! xoxo, -melanie-