A couple of years ago, I heard Simon T. Bailey speak. It was one of those talks that impacts you, but when you walk away, the only thing you have left is a nugget. And this was the nugget I heard:
Let go of the old to make way for the new.
In some ways, it’s become a mantra for me. Something that pops into my head at random times, reminding me to purge my to-do list. At other times, it’s just a gentle reminder that I can’t really start anything new without letting go of something old. And in those moments, I find myself asking, “What is old?”
That’s when it gets hard. Old things have history and meaning for us, so letting go of them can be a huge challenge. Old things have connection for us. Old things are friendships, barters, swaps, favors, points. Old things often have strings attached. So letting go of them requires major courage.
Old things aren’t necessarily bad. Some old things are good. But we could also paraphrase this quote to say, “You’ve got to get rid of the good to make way for the great.”
So then the challenge is, how do you get rid of the old, how do you get rid of the good, WITH LOVE? How do you make that call, set that boundary, redefine that relationship while still communicating the heart that wants to so love the world?
I don’t have that answer. I just know that the letting go, the making way, the giving up of good, the cutting ties to old, has to happen.
Friend, let’s talk. In the comments. What is OLD in your life? Not bad, just old? What is good? Not bad, just not great? What little nagging thing is in the back of your mind, that maybe you’re just afraid to let go of? How can we, as a community, help you do that? If you need to discuss, leave a note in the comments. There is a lot of wisdom that reads this blog, so I’d like to ask those of you who feel like you have heart to offer to leave a response as well.
Here is what I do know: within you, you have the courage to let go of the old and good. And on the other side of old and good, is a journey full of challenge and fulfillment, tears and sparkling eyes, hope and happiness, and so much more.
Lots of love, and happy Thursday,
Whitney
My old is my current design of my website. It is the thing that has been holding me back. To most it looks nice and pretty, but the backend doesn’t work properly. It’s a massive frustration for me every day. After Influence, I hired the right people to not only fix all of that, but also to partner with me. People that believe me and my business and just as importantly, I believe in them and their business. A partnership is a two-way street. It’s like finding the perfect shoe. You can walk a thousand great miles with the right pair! Thank you for this really fantastic post. Love your words and your heart.
Can’t wait to see your new front-end, ha! And looooove great technology infrastructure!
Okay. Deep breath. Here goes. With a blog that is 6.5 years old, I’ve had some identity crises lately. I chose a blog name during a very different time in my life. A lot of my audience came during that time, too. But I’ve had kids, my interests have changed, my content has changed, and most importantly, my walk with Christ has strengthened. A lot of my audience doesn’t relate to my newer content and some love the new content. So my community is changing. I’d like to change the blog name to my name to stop some of the limitations and strip it down to just me and my voice. Thanks for the challenge today. Your insight is always full of wisdom and life!
I totally understand this transition! Thank you so much for sharing!
Super question. How to get rid of the old, like some project or networking group in my world, something which is still a good idea, for some, but maybe not as great as it used to be for my business.
Finding a replacement that makes more sense as I start a new chapter of my business makes this easier. Example: Finding the new professional organization, as I begin to start asking whether the almost-old one still is worth the money/value. The more I think about the new thing I’m going to add into my schedule, the more excited I get, And so then, the other, older thing, that’s still good but tired, starts to feel like it needs a rest from my life.
Or, I find a way to honor or celebrate the older thing. Example – an old workbook/workshop I was very proud of, but was part of building up my business, and now is not useful to my target market. The workbook sits in a beautiful upright stand in my office, on display, so I can appreciate it, but let go of all the rest of the materials as well as the hope (guilt, really!) that I might one day offer this workshop again.
Sue–letting go of guilt is an AWESOME idea. I love it! thank you for sharing!
Ahhh…this is a tough one. Letting go of the old would have to be letting go of how a relationship ‘used to be’. It’s still an awesome friendship but we’re heading down different paths and are having to learn to support each other in new ways. It’s hard!
Oh, Marnie. I hear you. Different paths don’t mean any less love, but it’s still hard. Thank you for your insights!
Thank you for sharing your “old”. It sums up what I have been feeling, i have been fighting to hold on to the way a relationship used to be, because it was good and it was comfortable.
I have built by business with my family, specifically my niece, and she has decided to move on. I know I must embrace this change so our good relationship and my business can grow to be great!
Thank you again!
This is a beautiful post. I struggle with stepping out of my comfort zone, places that are good, but not great. My husband and I recently relocated to NYC and everything is new. I want to use this time of chang to challenge myself to seek out professional opportunities that are different than what I’ve only known, being an elementary school teacher. I want to continue writing and hope to connect with more people through my blog, but I don’t always feel like I know the best way to reach out. For me, the new is starting out and moving ahead on uncharted territory. The new is scary, but I agree, that the new can be great. Thank you for sharing your heart and encouraging me today!
Margot, love this! And FYI, I’m in the middle of figuring out this education thing with my kids and am looking for all sorts of basic resources on education. I thought teaching my kids would be basic, but it’s REALLY hard! Maybe you could write about that? 😉
Margot- that is exciting! I moved with my husband (for his job opportunity) just over a year ago from NC to Amarillo. HUGE change. In doing so, I quit insurance (YAY!) and I have been slowly perusing interior decorating/styling. It takes time, but I have joined different boards (with the art museum, & race for the cure) and I’ve found part time jobs at boutiques to stay a little bit busy while I sort things out! Both areas have opened pretty awesome doors. In this town, blogging isn’t very prevalent, but making actual connections has lead from one thing to another. A coworker introduced me to my first client and then another friend’s husband runs a development group and since she’s pregnant and won’t be able to be the in house designer, they offered me a job, so I start soon! So, fresh starts are fun!! Be fearless in making friends and reaching out! Sure, not everyone will be you friend, nor will you connect with everyone you reach out to, but you may find a handful of really great people in doing so. Nothing major has really happened over night (or over the course of 1 year for me), but my encouragement would just to plug in to different avenues of volunteer work or assisting in the arena that you may want to be a part of and go from there. Have business cards with your blog information to hand out. Whit-I love this post! To answer the question, though, I need to let go of my old blog and really dive in to a fresh online presence, name/brand, etc, etc so I can hone in on design a bit more and use that to connect online in a better way, so that if we do move back to NC, I have something to connect to the design market there or wherever, if that makes sense? But for starters, my macbook could use an overhaul. That thing runs at the pace of a snail, so it makes blogging SO difficult! I’ve been making an effort to instagram a bit better (so I hope) per our recent conversation! So, editing, refining, & making things cohesive would be great! Best of luck to Margot!
I just really struggled with this over the past week. I have a friend, who also worked for my company for the past 4 years. Our styles were just so different and the communication wasn’t as it should be to create a mutually beneficial partnership. I always pictured myself having a partner in my businesses and it took me 2 years to accept that she wasn’t the one {even though I knew it for at least that long – I now realize that I didn’t accept that}. It was good but not great.
I had to make the decision to end things, which was a big blow to my heart, and we are both very hurt. However, I am AMAZED at the doors that opened immediately after that weight was lifted, and at how much lighter I felt almost immediately. It made me realize that so much of my focus was on that not-so-great relationship that I wasn’t open to all of the good things that were right in front of me. The energy that was taking from me stunted everything from my creativity to the positive feelings about my business, my happiness and my professional and personal growth.
I’m thankful for the experience and ready for the great that I am once again open for.
Ouch Whitney, did you write this just for me? I think that cute little colorful arrow just poked me in the behind… 🙂 You already know that I’ve been struggling with letting go of the current identity of my store and its name – it’s super scary! BUT, now that I’ve decided it’s inevitable, I’ve started wrapping my head around how much I can be free of if I do it! I can basically “drop” all of the odd little projects that the previous owner did and not feel like I’m wasting time on things I don’t want to do. I can get rid of lines that I don’t really believe in or want to carry. Instead of the constant – order this, let’s try something new – I can just order what I know sells and change it up occasionally. I can scale back the variety and just go deeper with products (and services) that I enjoy and enjoying selling. It’s going to be a lot of work to make the switch (and some grieving too), but I can tell my sense of excitement is also building. Now I’m just praying for the courage (and energy and wisdom) to actually DO it!